________________________________________
AskTheCouch.com
The Sex Advice Column You've Always Wanted But Were Afraid You'd Ask!
http://AskTheCouch.com
Printer Friendly Copy
________________________________________
Dear Couch,
This is a bit odd
and I'm not sure if I'm
danger of anything at all. but... My wife gives
me an erection and just keeps it up by
fondling it for hours on end at
places we cant really do much sexually just to tease me.
if this goes on
for too long one (L or R) or both of my testicles swell up to nearly
twice
its size and really really hurt, I also get a sore gut, the only
thing that takes away the
pain is squeezing the inflamed sack really
hard, it eventually goes away after about 2
hours but its a real
annoyance. do I have more serious problems than I realize? My mate
had an
inflamed ball once and he went to the doctor and they said it was twisted
and cut
him open and fixed him. I don't think its cancer because
they're perfectly normal unless
this event of extended foreplay is used.
what shall I do?
Signed,
-Meat Saber
Dear Grizzle
Toothpick,
The only serious problem you have is 'Blue
Balls'.
Yup, it is a real condition.The basic physiology
behind blue balls is, during sexual
stimulation, the male's genitals become
engorged with blood,
including the testicles. Prolonged stimulation, as in hours,
results
in the scrotum getting to the point of actually squeezing the testicles
which hurts. Now many sites have incorrectly defined this as Epididymitis
like
Elf Sternberg's the Sexual
Anatomy of Men. Epididymitis
is an actual infection of the
epididymis which can't be caused by your wife
fondling you under the
table as you dine with your parents. In the immortal
words of '
Doctor. It hurts when I do this.' , DON'T DO THAT! Stop letting
your wife perform this hours long teasing activity and/or stop letting
yourself
get so turned on by it that you swell your balls. You don't
need to squeeze
your balls for hours to alleviate the pain as it will
subside by itself in a
couple of hours anyway. What you can do is take
the proverbial cold shower which
will reduce the swelling. *Note*
Ladies (and some guys), DO NOT let some schmuck
talk you into sex with
blue balls as an excuse. Just tell them not to get so
excited cause
they're not getting any no matter what. As to your mate, hell,
given
the British medical system, he's lucky he still has his balls.
The Couch
________________________________________
AskTheCouch.com
The Sex Advice Column You've Always Wanted But Were Afraid You'd Ask!
http://AskTheCouch.com
Printer Friendly Copy
________________________________________